Extremes of emotion

It struck me recently how Rosemary and Eleanor both experience extremes of emotion – in different, though sometimes similar, ways.

Recently, Eleanor has become very affectionate (and she was pretty affectionate to start with). She is giving constant cuddles (and back pats) and we’re fairly sure she’s been saying ‘I love you’, though as with most children of her age, her parents and grandparents are probably the only people who would recognise this. She runs up to Rosemary and gives her huge bear hugs. Yesterday, she managed to keep hugging Rosemary while they did a circuit of the dining room. Her face lights up when she sees someone she’s close to enter appear and she has the biggest smiles.

She laughs and nods and dances when she’s happy and babbles cheerfully to us and herself while she’s playing – more and more sounds emerging and now and then recognisable words jump out. She gets so excited when she’s managed to do something, clapping her hands and giggling and even saying ‘I did it!’

At the other end of the scale, though, if you take something she’s enjoying away from her, or take her away from something (the washing machine, the stairs, her highchair…), she screeches and kicks and arches her back and bangs her head. A few times she has even thrown things in what can only be construed as a rage.

And then there’s Rosemary, who can shower you with kisses and cuddles one moment and tell you you’re the worst mummy in the whole world ever the next. Who can read a reading book, write her name (or, more often these days, ‘poopoo pants’), draw and cut out intricate patterns and problem solve astoundingly, but will still throw herself to the ground and kick and scream if she doesn’t get what she wants, or something doesn’t work right for her. Rosemary, who is displaying the traits of a teenager a good few years too early, with her door slamming and sulks and stomping round the house.

They both recover fairly quickly and are ready for a cuddle, a tickle or a bit of bouncing around fairly soon after the upset, but they both do go from one extreme to another an awful lot of the time.

I had been wondering (as you do) whether this is fairly normal for their ages or not. I see children of both ages having similar rages and tears and tantrums, but I also see plenty who seem consistently calm. Then, yesterday morning, I was making scrambled eggs and my jumper caught on the handle, causing a fair dollop of egg mixture to spill out onto the hob. Instead of saying ‘Oh woops,’ or swearing under my breath, I screamed and stamped my foot. Yes, I screamed because something didn’t work for me.

And this morning I slammed a few doors and swore because the recycling needing to be put out. The other day, I sat on the floor, put my head in my hands and whined. Yes, whined. And you know what? Chris has his moments, too.

It’s hardly a surprise that our daughters can be a bit moody.

Do your children have extremes of emotion? Do they have the same emotional temperament as you or are they very different? Do you still scream and slam doors?